Sabatoge...tasty tasty Sabatoge

As you might remember, I've been on Phase I of the South Beach Diet since August 13th. It's the strict phase where the list of things you can't eat far exceed the list of things you can. It's also the phase where you lose the most weight, the icky stuff around the middle, in the shortest amount of time. You're really only supposed to do Phase I for 2 weeks, but I stayed on a little longer to make supper time easier on my family since my husband started 4 days after I did. It really did go much better than I ever imagined, and my cravings for all the carb loaded things I love to eat quickly went away. Not to say I didn't want to have a big old slice of pizza, I just knew I couldn't. Believe me, there will never ever be a time when I have a beyond belief craving for lettuce with vinegar and oil.

We decided to take the long holiday weekend off from the diet, starting today. We've got parties, cookouts and all other sorts of things going on and the ability to find things on our Phase I "list" at potluck events are pretty limited. Besides that, my husband wants to drink - which is another thing you can't do in Phase I.

So, suffice it to say, I have fallen hard off the wagon I was doing so well staying on. I'm certain that, with what I've eaten already today, I have undone in my 6 1/2 waking hours today everything I accomplished over the course of the last 17 days. I figure I should be in a food consumption coma in, oh roughly, 4 hours. At least I'm going out with a tummy full of ooey gooey cheesy greasy sugary yumminess and a smile on my face. Nothing I've eaten today remotely resembles a vegetable or leafy green - hell, nothing I've eaten hasn't been loaded with carbs or sugar! (8 grain bagel with butter, large french vanilla latte, slice of cheese and sausage pizza, triple chocolate pudding cup)

I lost 8 pounds in that 17 days and I'm now (or at least I was yesterday) within 2 pounds of my pre-baby weight. You know, the baby that is going to be 7 years old in December, yeah, that's the one.

I know, I know. 8 pounds - big deal. It is though. The only difference I can really tell is that all my pants/bottoms fit looser, much looser, to the point where I have to make sure my shirt is long enough to cover my underwear from showing. I don't think I look any different than I did with those 8 pounds.

To me it's an emotional thing, my weight. I've always been thin. Mostly, anyway. The day I moved into college I weighed 105 pounds. And I'm 5'7". By the time I came home for Christmas break that year I had gained 30 pounds. When I came home at the end of the school year I weighed 185!!! I gained 80 pounds! The freshman 15 and the transfer 20 plus plus plus! It was horrible. I was miserable.

Since then, and that was quite a few years ago (1992), I've been very aware of my weight. I make it a point to be within 5 pounds of what the weight on my drivers license says. Because, let's be serious, I wasn't fooling anyone way back then into believing for one second that I was anywhere near 105 pounds!

So, here I am now. 35 years old. 131 pounds. And ok with it. Not to say I'd be more ok with being 125 pounds, that's my goal after all, but still ok. And I'm going back on Phase I on September 10.